had a thought today when i was walking home, tired and stressed, my mind reeling, wondering what kind of dinner you should make at 10:30 at night:
i’ve wanted to be a filmmaker for a long time now, and at some point i must’ve decided that being a filmmaker and not getting paid for it is better than spending my time thinking about someday doing it. so i spend every waking hour of my week working and making sketches and shorts and having meetings and taking night classes and writing and producing and reading other people’s work and this has seemed to go on forever and shows no sign of stopping, but i realized today i am a filmmaker, and what you want isn’t exactly how you planned sometimes, but it’s still pretty fuckin cool.
"If I became a philosopher, if I have so keenly sought this fame for which I’m still waiting, it’s all been to seduce women basically."
—
Sartre
Of all the writers out there, Sartre is the one I most relate to and most aspire to be like (minus the whole 1000+ page book on philosophizing death).
(Source: odettenoire, via fuckyeahexistentialism)
"If you’re in a relationship when you leave high school, let her go, man. Seriously. If you don’t, you’re just gonna do it when one of you’s at Connecticut College and the other is at NYU. You should’ve learned this in biology. We’re not meant to settle down when we’re so young. Seriously, give your loved one one last kiss. If it’s meant to be, you’ll come back together with your own money in your checking account and a lot of more experience under your belt. Nothing’s more attractive than confidence. Why am I telling you this? Because it’s time to work. It’s time to figure out what you want to do. It’s time to hustle. You can’t hustle if you’re sneaking off every 2 hours to talk to your boo. I know, my advice sucks, right? It’s cool, you’ll get it. You’re young. You got your whole 20s ahead of you. Go your separate ways. Relationships only work when as an individual, you feel your life is up to par. When you feel like it’s all it can be without someone else to complement it."
—
Excerpt from a speech I gave to Onteora High School’s graduating class of 2010
I’m speaking at Eureka College next month and for shits and giggles, I re-read this. It makes me really excited to have been so bold with a crowd of high schoolers. Because I was right.
(via joshruben)
Wow, this is good.
(via bhbanks)
holy shit josh
(via bhbanks)
In the past few days…
- My dear friend Mike taught me how to dance. Like, with a guy. Specifically with him. And I like, didn’t trip or anything, and he said I did good (and seemed to mean it?!), and it was fun! For once in my life I felt like a REAL LADY.
- My best friend Lauren and I went on an adventure in Park Slope where we encountered many people we knew - including a slew of comedians and a goddamn hippie commune. We lost a bet with Kevin Barnett who dared us not to fall in love with Justin Bieber after watching Never Say Never, and Jordan Carlos told me I look like a young Anne Bancroft, which I’ll accept because I have in fact seduced a younger man before.
- I ate the best stoner food in the history of stoner food - chicken and fried rice with goddamn FRENCH FRIES MIXED INTO IT, followed by a cold, syrupy pancake. It sounds weird but just trust me you guys.
- I worked with Hugh Jackman! Motherfuckin Wolverine! He is insanely kind and dashing and enjoys cheap burritos that were bought for the crew more than the $40 dried fruit plate that was bought specially for him. Whatta guy.
- Apparently Madonna (Motherfuckin Madonna!) was shown this episode of Very Mary-Kate while on set for a recent music video and thought it was funny. She liked something I produced. My brain exploded. Then I went home and made out with my True Blue poster.
- Anders and I increased our credit card debt by signing up for a screenwriting workshop that will force me to stick to my resolutions and (at least partially) get me over my fear of sucking - kind of like therapy for struggling writers. I have a great feeling about this one - in the first class the instructor referenced Withnail and I, which is one of my all-time favorite films that no one ever references ever (except British people, who don’t really count). Already I’ve been thinking about some of my script ideas differently… I’m excited to see my progress over the next 4 weeks!
xoxo
After the shit storm that was 2011, I am hell-bent on making 2012 a stellar year.
My list of New Year’s resolutions:
-exercising more than once a week
-staying single until May (seems arbitrary, I know)
-finishing at least one of the screenplays I’ve started.
My first step to achieving this was to sign myself up for several random, FREE writing workshops all over the city. I decided to do this after two different people recommended I try them out in the same week - seemed fortuitous and a good motivator. I’ve got like 3 or 4 to attend and had my first one last night. It was great!
Ela Thier’s Independent Film School was 3 hours long, quirky, entertaining, neurotically Jewish, and very helpful. She got us to talk to strangers about our writing and gave us lots of helpful exercises to aid in free writing and defeating writer’s block. Some of the things she suggested, although mildly eccentric, I think might really help - don’t bother with outlines and write long-hand for the first draft. Her reasoning was that we get too tripped up over thinking about structure and self-editing on a computer because of how pristine it looks; in my case she is TOTALLY RIGHT. I have a genius writer friend who writes long-hand and I always thought he was a tool for doing so, but now I get it.
The most encouraging thing she said was an anecdote she got from a former Olympic-training roommate of hers, and I like this because it applies to TWO of my New Year’s goals. ”The difference between an Olympic athlete and someone who walks 10 minutes every day is very small. The difference between someone who walks 10 minutes every day and someone who does nothing is huge.”
"What can be done? Say who you are, really say it in your life and in your work. Tell someone out there who is lost, someone not yet born, someone who won’t be born for 500 years. Your writing will be a record of your time. It can’t help but be that. But more importantly, if you’re honest about who you are, you’ll help that person be less lonely in their world because that person will recognise him or herself in you and that will give them hope. It’s done so for me and I have to keep rediscovering it. It has profound importance in my life. Give that to the world, rather than selling something to the world. Don’t allow yourself to be tricked into thinking that the way things are is the way the world must work and that in the end selling is what everyone must do. Try not to."
— Charlie Kaufman’s BAFTA speech on screenwriting is predictably about itself, and predictably rambly, and predictably brilliant. (via boringoldraphael)
So It’s raining. It’s only Tuesday. Your neighbor’s fire alarm has been going off all day and shows no signs of stopping. Here’s how to turn this night into a win!
1) Make your favorite drink. In my case, it’s a vodka martini with the fanciest olives you can afford.
2) Put on some cheerful music. I’ve chosen Heroes and Sheroes by The Eames Era. It’s all about how stupid boys are!
3) Make breakfast for dinner. I cannot stress this enough. It’s a surefire way to make anyone happy - just don’t be mad when you break the yolk and burn the garlic. C’est la vie, right?
4) Watch Days of Being Wild by the unbeatable Wong Kar Wai and relate to every heart-wrenching minute of it. Yeah, life IS tough, Maggie Cheung! It is also crazy, beautiful, and unexpected. Thanks for the reminder.
5) Go to sleep with the knowledge that in the morning you’ll be working with Gilbert Gottfried. Oh boy!
